Corbyn Resentful So Many Who Signed His Petition Still Haven’t Sponsored His Swim

It has today surfaced that Jeremy Corbyn is “a little bit miffed” that so many people have signed his petition calling for the recall of parliament but that most of those same people still haven’t sponsored his charity swim next month.

He has allegedly been private messaging all his friends who have signed the petition saying, “Hey super glad you signed the petition; you know British steel manufacturing is an issue really close to my heart. Just wondering if you could sponsor my swim for Children in Need now? I posted it on Facebook like a month ago and you never chipped in anything. I’m not saying you have to, it’s just, the fact you’ve signed my petition means you clearly read my updates. Even just a quid would be fine. I thought you of all people cared about children, but if you just want to sign a petition without actually giving money to help people then that’s just fine. Seriously, fine.”

Photo Credit: David Hunt

Photo Credit: David Hunt

Corbyn spoke to his supporters today, saying, “I am immensely proud that within the space of a few hours we have been able to reach over 100,000 signatures for this petition which will recall the government to deal with the urgent crisis facing our steel industry. To put this achievement into perspective; I’ve had my JustGiving profile active for three weeks now and have only received 12% of my total target. That’s £12. And £6 of that is from Diane Abbott. If anyone wants to sponsor my 250 metre swim next month, the link is on my website.”

He continued, “You know, it’s actually pretty pathetic that so many of you will sign a petition and now just give one measly pound to Children in Need. You’re not a hero for letting Google autocomplete a bloody online form. Yes, I know that Children In Need and Tata Steel are two different issues, but it’s about your attitude to society. Put your money where your mouth is.”

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