Relationships: I Wouldn’t Have Given Him Steak If I Knew He’d Be So Fucking Unappreciative

Today we have a guest publication from Julie Ellesons; writer of magazine The Sexy Swish which helps women to navigate the workplace by explaining when your boss is being sexist and when it’s actually that you’re terrible at your job! Over to Julie!

I am obviously a feminist, but just because I’m a feminist doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy cooking, OK? Women can cook and serve the men in their life willingly and joyfully and it doesn’t mean we’re not feminists OK get off my back ughhhh. Anyway, so tonight I decided that I would really pull out all of the stops to make the man in my life happy. So I went to Waitrose and I bought some really nice Ribeye steak. Let’s be honest, even Essential Waitrose steak is pretty bloody fancy but I didn’t just do that – I went for the Duchy Original stuff.

So, I come home and he’s just there on the sofa and he starts moaning at me because I was out for like three hours and the whole flat smells of shit. So I’m all “just chill a sec, K??” and I go to the kitchen and I preheat the pan, I season the steak, rub it with olive oil, I flash fry it reaaaaal nice. Then I take it off the heat, let it rest. I garnish it with some parsley. It’s real good.

Anyway, so I give it to him and he literally eats it in silence and just goes back to licking his arse. I really would never have given my cat any steak if I’d realised he’d be so fucking unappreciative.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, that women can work hard like the hardass feminist they are, come home and make dinner like the hardass feminist they are (because feminism is about giving women freedom to choose their own destiny, arsehole) but until the patriarchy stops infiltrating and poisoning our pets then we’ll continue to be weighed down. Fight the power and don’t let any man – cat or otherwise – disrespect you.

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