Computer Screen Hurt By Repeated New Year’s Jokes About Its Resolution

A local computer screen, belonging to Harry Alderton, 31, of Banbury Road, is reportedly very hurt by Harry’s repeated jokes about its resolution. It has been reported that every time someone asks Mr Alderton about any New Year’s Resolutions, he replies that his New Year’s resolution is “1920 x 1080”. He has allegedly told this joke to his 341 Facebook friends, his local newsagent and his friends down the pub who called him “a legend”. Some witnesses have said he frequently follows this joke up by saying “Ha I am such a geek, right?”


Speaking exclusively to The Islington Echo, the Acer monitor told us, “I’ve been using 640 x 480 for years and Harry’s never tried to change it. I don’t even think he knows how.”

It continued, “I don’t want people to think I don’t have a sense of humour or anything but seriously, it isn’t easy to maintain all these pixels and I don’t like being treated as though I’m something regrettable that needs to be improved upon in the New Year.”

The Acer then finished by telling us, “It’s not like he couldn’t do with an actual New Year’s resolution. I can tell from my webcam that he’s actually really fat, so maybe he should be working on that. The prick.”


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