Man struggles to choose between hatred of ISIS and hatred of Cameron

Geoffrey Henley, of Caledonian Road, today told reporters that he is unsure about whether to support military air strikes in Syria because he really enjoys watching David Cameron fail. We spoke to him exclusively today.

Photo Credit: Mortiz Hagar

Photo Credit: Mortiz Hagar

“Of course I think ISIS are despicable and we should therefore have them feel the full force of her majesty’s military,” Mr Henley told Islington Echo, “But then again, that’s what Cameron wants and I’m just not really comfortable agreeing with anything that man does, thinks or says.”

Mr Henley continued, “On the one hand, ISIS are bastards. On the other hand, Cameron’s a twat. It’s really nice to think that Eton Bumbletwat might fail again. Decisions decisions.” Mr Henley then went on to say that he had read a Spectator article about why bombing ISIS is possibly a bad idea strategically and would inevitably result in thousands of civilian deaths, which Geoff felt sounded “like it sort of made sense in a way”.

It was then that Mr Henley told us, “Oscar Wilde once said ‘whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong’. It’s like that for me, but just with David Cameron. You know what? That’s decided it. I’m against air strikes in Syria.”

 

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